all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
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