I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
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