Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
I think i got beer on your cat.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
