She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize
