She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
They are going to name an STD after you.
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
Randomize
