You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
Randomize
