It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
Randomize
