So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize
