Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
My legs feel like baby dolphins
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
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