If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
Oh my god. I opened up my microwave and there was a pile of bacon in it. It's like my mother knew I'd be hungover.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
Randomize
