I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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