the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
Randomize
