The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
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