So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
Randomize
