you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
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