I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
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