...so i touched it.
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
I'm bleeding and have questions
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize
