Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
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