We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
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