But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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