Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
Randomize
