you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
Just promise me we won't die tonight. I can't have an autopsy report that reads "stomach contents: Tequila and semen."
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
Randomize
