I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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