Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
Randomize
