just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
I think I just sharted jello shots
Randomize
