and then I told her I was too drunk. She started to cry, and told me this always happens to her and that she thinks shes ugly. I pretended I was asleep and then she farted.
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
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