just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
