READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
