I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize
