some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
You were screaming at a bartender last night for not referring to you as god.
and apparently I tried to pay for beer with a tampon.
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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