We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
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