love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
Are you saying I'm your favorite hot mess?
I'm actually my favorite my hot mess, but you're a close second.
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
Randomize
