i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
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