I want to walk on stilts...naked
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
My breath smells like gin and sadness
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
