So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
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