too bad you live with your parents still
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
Do you remember whose house we're in?
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize