Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
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