I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
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