Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
I am naked and annoyed.
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
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