At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
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