why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
Randomize
