clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
