so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Randomize
