So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
That's the last time you call me to prove to some girl at a bar that you're English. It's bad enough that you actually get to fuck them because of it without having to wake me up to seal the deal.
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
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