3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
Dear Derek. I would like to offer my sincerest apology for the 2 to 6 text messages you are about to read. Also for the 15 minute voicemail, which may or may not have sent. Sincerely, Sober Katie
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
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