But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
Randomize
