Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
it was like eating out sand paper
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
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