I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
Randomize
