don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
Sorry, Geoff can’t come to his phone right now. He’s outside trying to show his dick to a bachelorette party bus with “DTF” written on the windows
Randomize
