next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
Randomize
