North Korea, Best Korea!
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
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